Why Am I So Irritable? Natural Ways to Reduce Menopause & Perimenopause Anger (That Actually Work)
- Andrea Marsh
- Apr 14
- 8 min read
Updated: 3 days ago
If you’ve found yourself snapping at loved ones, feeling overwhelmed by frustration, or reacting in ways that don’t feel like “you” — you’re not alone.
Right now, I’m seeing a noticeable rise in irritability in many of the women around me… including me; as is always the case in Springtime.
So what’s going on?
In Chinese medicine, our bodies move with the seasons and Spring is a volatile but productive one. No matter what the weather is doing the energy jeeps moving, Spring energy is a rising energy and this energy is powerful, upward-moving, and unstoppable.
In perimenopause and menopause, that rising energy can manifest as emotions as well as symptoms; maybe you're experiencing Irritability Frustration Impatience or are having sudden out bursts of anger?
Let’s explore why this happens — and more importantly, how to reduce menopause irritability naturally.
Why Menopause Can Make You Feel So Angry
With angry outbursts seemingly coming from nowhere and suddenly biting off your kids and colleagues heads or making your partner run for cover. You may really not like yourself at this point; and I get it. I feel so guilty if I've shouted at the dog I spend a week trying to be on my best behaviour! This uncontrollable shaking, instantaneous rage that takes over and you let loose with all your bile and then you feel a bit shamefaced afterwards? I've been there and a lot of my clients feel so bad when they first come for treatment as they say: My poor husband, he really gets a full blast from me and I don't know why I'm like it?
“I feel like I’ve turned into a different person overnight.”
That quick temper, the rage that appears out of nowhere, the guilt afterwards… it can be deeply unsettling.
But here’s the important part:
This isn’t just emotional — it’s physical.
In Chinese medicine, anger is closely linked to the Liver.
During Spring, the Liver’s energy naturally becomes more active. Combine that with hormonal changes during perimenopause, and you can end up with energy that feels stuck or overheate and ready to explode
Instead of flowing smoothly, it builds up — and comes out as irritability; and this is linked to how well your liver is physically working.
The Spring–Liver Connection (And What It Means for You)
Spring is associated with the Wood element in Chinese medicine. Think of a healthy tree:
Strong, but flexible - even in the toughest climate
Able to bend without breaking - let's get you back to easy going
That’s how your body and emotions should feel. But when your liver is struggling to filter well you start to not manage life and you'll find yourself being beligerent and wondering why you've made such a situation out of something inconsequential... it gets you like that!
When things are out of balance, as well as the increased irritability or anger you may notice you have more:
Headaches or migraines
Tight muscles or tendon issues
Digestive symptoms (bloating, nausea, gas, reflux)
Cravings for sour foods (like lemon or lime)
Feeling hotter than usual
Night sweats between 1 and 3am
This is your body asking for support — not something to ignore.
How to reduce menopause irritability naturally
This is key: Help your body release and rebalance this rising energy to feel good again!
You have excess energy bubbling inside of you right now and this is good - we can put it to use elsewhere and turn it into healing energy. In menopause this makes it a quick win! When you have excess energy it's usually in the wrong place and getting up to mischief so let's redirect it and help you.
In the image above there are a set of associations that link with Spring. In Chinese medicine (TCM) this is the season of the wood element and as well as getting ratty you may also find your eyes are fuzzier, that you're craving green veg or citrus fruits like lime. You may crave this sour flavour or you may even belch and it has a sourness to it. You may have low level nausea, or get a ligament or tendon injury when you exercise; these can all be linked in TCM.
Here are the most effective natural remedies I use with clients: that will also help you have a far better menopause transition!
Essential oils calm irritability in seconds
Rose oil resonates with the liver and softens/relieves anger. I find this in my practise that if a woman loves rose often she doesn’t realise she even gets angry. Inhaling the scent of rose eases the tension and calms the spirit. Do you love the smell of rose? It ranges from pure oil (extremely expensive) so items that have real essential oil in them like a hand cream. Inhale the scen first as this travels to your limbic centre in the brain and the magic starts! Then you can massage a small pea-sized amount into your inner wrist andyou'll feel the relief.
I’m also a fan of rose water, I spritz it on my face first thing every morning. It balances the pH levels in your skin and kick starts your day with a beautiful scent. As long as the rose you’re sniffing comes from a real rose extract (i.e. not chemical) you will feel the therapeutic benefits from it.
Lime and grapefruit essential oils are also great for the liver. These are for physical cleansing and if you love the scent of them then your liver would appreciate a detox on some level. This is why it’s great to start with essential oils as they indicate the next steps in your health journey. Most citrus oils will help your liver to some degree but their scent is also very uplifting and can work in a matter of seconds so have a sniff and decide your favourite and you have another tool in your kit for lifting your moods.
Note: Grapefruit is often contraindicated with western medicine so please check before you use and consult a health professional if you’re unsure.
Inhaling essential oils and their physiological and emotional associations is called Pharmacognosy – using plants as your medicine. Check out this Jodi Cohen book – Essential oils to boost the brain and heal the body if you're interested in knowing more.
I developed Blossom from a tried and tested* blend of essential oils to help relieve heat symptoms and calm anxiety down. Blossom oil may help you get a better night's sleep, relieve night sweats, hot flushes, calm anxiety and ease irritability. (Also great on stings and insect bites!)
*tested on over 200 women.
Support Your Liver (The Missing Piece for Hormone Balance)
Your Liver is your body’s main detox organ — and it plays a huge role in hormone balance.
When it’s overloaded, symptoms can include: night sweats, nausea, stomach issues/gas, migraines, tendon/ligament issues; a struggling liver is the root cause of a majority of hormone imbalances and even thyroid issues.
Your liver is a giant filter it’s the hardest working organ in the body and when it’s clogged up it let’s you know this by giving you symptoms. These symptoms are called Excess ones in TCM and are mainly heat or dry based. You’ll feel hotter if you have liver symptoms; and in bed you’ll not want to lie on your right hand side as you heat up too quickly.
Simple ways to support it:
Warm lemon water in the morning (flush out last nights toxins!)
Reduce sugar (including hidden sugars like bread, pasta, alcohol)
Eat bitter greens (rocket, dandelion, artichoke)
Consider herbal liver support (e.g. milk thistle, liquorice root)
✨ The good news?This is often an “excess” condition — meaning you can feel better relatively quickly once you reduce the load.
You can support your liver gently with a daily herbal blend or you can go the full detox route. I recommend a good detox if your symptoms are extreme; I did one a few years back and it really changed my whole menopause. A detox is the removal of food/drink that exacerbates your symptoms whilst taking supportive remedies.
Liver herbs are greenery like artichoke, dandelion, milk thistle plus roots like liquorice. If you want to get a good blend then I have a Liver support in my free supplements guide here.
Take the pain out of finding out how to do a liver detox - Get my liver detox guide here to take you through your detox step by step!
Try Qi Gong (For Calm Without Sitting Still)
If meditation feels impossible when you’re wound up — this is for you; Qi Gong (it's a bit more active than Tai Chi). Known as meditation through movement. Qi Gong uses gentle movement and breath to:
Release built-up tension
Improve energy flow
Calm the mind
Support better sleep
Once you get into the flow of things you start to realise you feel calmer as you’re focusing on the movement. The outcome of Qi Gong is that you’ve done a physical exercise without exhausting yourself; in fact you may feel more energised. You will feel calmer and less likely to explode today!
Qi (Chee) will be flow better - your liver has been massaged and this aids the detoxification process. You may sleep better just from doing Qi Gong. It’s a moving meditation — ideal during menopause when stillness can feel frustrating.
Holistic therapies for deeper emotional balance
As well as supporting your liver to detox with dietary changes therapies can take you deeper especially my modality - Shiatsu. These therapies help regulate your nervous system and release stored emotional tension relieving muscle tension and balancing your moods - creating a deep inner calmness.
Supportive therapies include:
Shiatsu
Acupuncture
Reflexology
Breathwork
EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique)
Bach flower remedies
If you're struggling emotionally a blend of Bach flower remedies are a go-to to help support you. With 38 remedies to choose from a bespoke selection of these are blended specifically for your needs - the aim is to bring you back to calm and emotional balance.
The Truth About Menopause Irritability
There’s no single “quick fix” — but there is a clear path. When you:
Support your Liver
Calm your nervous system
Move your body gently
Use natural remedies consistently
You’ll notice something powerful:
💡 Not only does your irritability improve ... Many other menopause symptoms will ease too.
Because your body works as a whole — not in isolated symptoms - this is truly holistic.
Would you like help reducing menopause irritability and other symptoms?
Andrea offers a holistic consultation to help you reduce your symptoms whether menopause or health related naturally and effectively. This is done with the wisdom of Chinese medicine which views your unique energy patterns and enables Andrea to create a plan with simple steps for you to follow to achieve your goals.Whether you're into self-help or would lije support from Andrea view all of your options here.
Meet Andrea
Andrea is a shiatsu and chinese medicine practitioner who uses the principles of chinese medicine in a completely practical way to help you resolve your symptoms naturally and for good. If you live locally you can book in for wonderfully relaxing Shiatsu for Menopause where we start to relieve your symptoms on the same day. Otherwise Andrea does online indepth consultations where you'll leave with an actionable plan to follow. Andrea is also passionate about doing workplace talks and is passionate about getting this message out to as many women as possible: Give your body what it wants to create the hormones that it needs!
